not this house
Also coming out are this girl and her friend that Buhls knows, as well as a couple friends of the House. Two points need to be made:
-The girls are hot
-House's friends, although nice guys, are socially awkward. I mean really socially awkward. Makes Steve Buscemi look like Casanova
why do you always have to get me involved?
That's not really fair, Steve Buscemi is actually quite charasmatic, he just plays a lot of socially awkward characters
So anyhow, we are all sitting at the House's house, having a few drinks, waiting to go to the pub. Everyone is talking, drinks are flowing, and then the story happened.
The most awkward guy of the group decides to tell a story about what happened to him in Vegas:
So the story goes that last trip to Vegas, he and his group of friends were out drinking. At some point this hot black girl starts grinding on him, they dance, drink and talk, and eventually she says "Let's go to my place". He being drunk and foolish gets into her car, goes out on the freeway, and ends up in some random parking lot in a random neighbourhood in Las Vegas.
Oh yeah, this is a good idea
So the story goes, she then proceeds to start blowing him like that chick in the Burger King ad
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yeah thats the one
meanwhile she's feeling around his pockets, eventually she reaches over, opens the car door and pushes him out, peels out of the parking lot taking all his money save an emergency fifty in his shoe and for some reason his glasses. So she peels out and leaves him in a parking lot in stabbytown part of Vegas with his pants around his ankles, practically no money, and a boner.
Then somehow he gets a cab and takes a cab to the strip where his hotel was. Now why he only took a cab to the strip and decided to walk the strip to the hotel I don't know, but he did. Halfway down the strip he inexplicibally decides he's a little thirsty, and stops into a bar to grab a quick drink. While he's there this hot black chick (a different one) says to him something like "why so glum, chum?" and he tells her that he just got robbed, and he's trying to get back to his hotel, etc etc etc. So she buys him a drink, he buys her a drink so on and so forth (there's only 20 dollars left of the emergency fifty at this point). She says to him "Let's go up to my room" and he figures "Why not?". I don't think it's any surprise what happens now
That's right; she robs him, He get up to her room and they start making out, she says "How much money do you have?", he says "Twenty dollars?" and she gets all mad, grabs the twenty out of his hand and starts making a phone call. Now at this point, most people know that nothing good is going to happen and get the fuck out of Dodge. Not this guy. He still thinks he might get laid. So he tries talking to the girl, and momentarily two very large, very muscular, very black pimps arrive. One of them may have been Mr. UndaCova. Somehow he gets by them books it down the hall, runs down stairs and (belatedly) gets the fuck out of Dodge. He makes it back to his hotel, passes out and there our story ends.
So after hearing the story, a few things run through my mind:
-Wow does this guy not have any social skills whatsoever
-This guy is lucky to be alive
-I'm so glad that shit like that didn't happen to me and Dave in Vegas
By this time I have pretty much figured out that this socially awkward fellow has the hots for the hot chicks. And I may not be the smoothest fellow in the world, but I do know that if you are trying to wheel a girl, perhaps that is not the best time for the "I got robbed by a hooker in Vegas. Twice." story. The only thing that could have made it worse was if he was wearing the commemorative T-Shirt.
It was pretty funny watching at the pub as he cruised around hovering on the periphery of the area the girls were at, but never actually doing anything other than creeping. Until he danced.
Needless to say that he did not do so well with the women.
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